Hope and Despair

On December 31st, 2022 Toronto fogged over.

I excitedly grabbed my camera and began walking around the downtown core shooting a variety of shots of light streaks and damp paths.

That day fit the mood I was in perfectly. In fact, I’d say it probably fit the mood of the past few years perfectly. Dampness that gets into your bones and chills you. Unable to see too far down the road, and a lot of empty questions.

As I continued my walk, I saw someone standing isolated in the fog. Surrounded by water and emptiness I quickly grabbed my camera and took what (at the time) was my favourite photo of the year. A lone person in a sea of darkness and isolation.

A person stands in a sea of fog and gloom

I spent quite some time working to isolate the subject of the photo. Masking the individual in the lightroom and working on the contrast and balance I felt was appropriate. Seeing as it was one of my favourites, I posted it to Instagram and left it as I moved on into the new year.

But that new year brought continued work with my therapist. There’s plenty to dive into there, but that’s another matter. What’s important is that therapy has been a huge help in addressing a lot of things, not the least of which is my depression.

Digital photography is a remarkable art form. We take photos, we get to focus and highlight aspects. We can do this with film, but more tricks and equipment are needed. Digital allows to take the same photo and apply new skills, new feelings, new thoughts, and embed them into the photo.

In 2023 I started doing small art shows through RAW Artists. I had never displayed my photography in that kind of setting and felt I wanted to see what would happen. (I’ve previously talked about my first show with them.) I selected my favourites to be on display and started printing them off to decide which ones I’d actually try and sell.

When the copy of my favourite photo of 2022 arrived, I was unimpressed. Something had changed in the time I first took the photo to that point. In the months leading up to the show I started to really address my depression, and that changed the way I saw this photo.

I no longer resonated with the isolation the same way. It wasn’t something to wallow in, but something to try and fight against. It was now something where I would look to the future and not feel as bogged down, as locked away, as cut off in an encroaching darkness, but rather I was looking for the light.

And so I reworked it.

The two have become a beautiful contrast. Moments in time and feeling. And it’s that idea that is why I’m doing my first ever solo art show.

From March 17th till 23rd I’ll be displaying a series of photos at Gallery 978 in Toronto. As I was passing by the location, I saw a sign offering the space to people looking to display their work. I hadn’t come up with the idea of looking at how my photography had changed as I worked on my mental health. But talking with Lev from the gallery, it all came together.

I’m both scared and excited about doing this. It’s a huge thing at any point for someone to be displaying their art, but to also be vulnerable with their story and their life.

I hope you’ll consider swinging by. If you do, I hope you enjoy.

Thank you, fellow wanderer.

Next Post

Previous Post

Leave a Reply

© 2025

Theme by Anders Norén